Objects in mirror are larger than they appear

Ok, so all along I have been thinking that I am having a boy.  First of all, I just have a feeling it's a boy...I don't know why.  Then, I have been feeling as if I am carrying all in my belly region and that there hasn't been much "spread".  Now, I think that lends credence to the fact that it could be a boy because I have always heard that boys carry largely like a basketball and you can't really tell from looking at the mother from behind if she's pregnant or not because her fat doesn't spread all around her body.  Up until this week, I was feeling like I was all belly because my face hasn't really changed, my rings fit the same, and my body seemed to be mostly the same except for the mini me in me belly.  Now, if you noticed, in that last sentence, I said "up until this week".  Let me tell you why.  I had bought some maternity pants about 2 months ago for work and I hadn't yet gotten the last two pairs hemmed, but I was needing them done, so I asked Nicole to finish them.  So, I tried them on and, when I put on the first pair, it felt strangely tight around my ass region.  I went in to where Nicole was sitting and I said, "these feel really tight!"  I would like to say that her reply was reassuring and made me feel better, but it went more like this.  She saw me and her face contorted a bit and she said, "huh".  "Huh?" I replied.  She asked me to turn around (which I did) and again she went, "huh".  I spun around and she said, "Try bending over".  "Why?  Because you want to see if they're going to rip when I bend over?!?!"  At that point, I would like to say that she said something more supportive, but she kind of chuckled at me and didn't really say anything, but dind't really stop laughing either until I started crying.  Yes, I said I started crying.  DAMN HORMONES!!!  At this point, she said she would fix them, but, folks, the only way she can fix them is if she shaves about 6 inches OFF MY ASS!!!  So that experience had me look at things in a different light.  I began to realize that maybe there is a little more fat on my body (especially my back side) than I was willing to admit.

The next experience that made me reconsider how big I may be getting was what happened with some of Nicole's students.  Now, for those of you who don't know, Nicole teaches in the same school that I work in and she teaches the funtional skills high school class.  That means that most of these kids read on like a first grade level and need things presented to them in the most concrete terms possible.  In other words, if you ask these guys what state they live in, they will probably answer something like, "Uh, Hartford?"  So, one of Nicole's students walked past me in the hall, looked at my belly with her eyes bulging, and said, "Dr. Jen, do you have a baby?"  I told her not yet, but I was growing one and she smiled and kind of just walked away.  Later that day when I went into her classroom, one of the other kids says, "Hey! A baby?"  "Yes, a baby.  Just not yet".  Then, one of Nicole's favorite kids (who often chuckles in his seat as he replays in his head the last Tom and Jerry cartoon he watched the night before) was asked if he had heard that I was goign to have a baby.  He looked at me a bit confused and said, "There's a baby in there?" and I said yes.  Then, Nicole's assistant teacher, LaShintia, asked the student what is the appropriate thing to say to someone who has just told you they are pregnant.  He looked at her completely baffled for a moment, took a second to mentally scroll through his list of polite responses, and replied, "You're welcome".  At this point, folks, I tell you I had to leave the room temporarily because I feared  may lose bladder control from laughing. 

Those interactions, as well as the fact that I keep bumping in to things, can no longer put my socks on without grunting, and can not pick anything up from the floor while sitting in a chair have all led me to believe that I may not be carrying my weight as well as I had thought.  So maybe this is a girl making herself comfy in there.  If that's the case, then I start to worry about that old wives tale of "a girl steals her mother's beauty".  Thankfully, no one has said that one to me yet...Oh wait...I forgot...someone already has.  Thanks, Fatima!  Be-atch.